I rolled over and looked at the alarm clock through the cracks of my eyelids. 4:39. 4:39. 4:39. It was flashing. Bright red and flashing. Like a warning signal. Obviously the power had gone out sometime during the night and now the clock needed to be reset. That was an issue. But the first issue - and most important one- was what time was it really?
Time runs our lives. And depending on what the correct time was, I either needed to get up and make my way to the coffee pot and get my day started or roll back over and catch a few more z's. The only problem was I wouldn't know until I found the real time. I needed a backup. My alarm clock had failed me. It's blinking signified it was 9 minutes past my normal getting up time, but I knew that it was quite possibly the wrong time, and that was doing me absolutely no good. So I reached over beside me and located my cell phone. 4:10. Okay. Good. I hadn't overslept, and actually had a few more minutes to lie in bed and prepare myself for the day ahead. First thing on my agenda was going to be to reset the clocks, because I knew if the one beside my bed was flashing, all the other ones in the house were going to be flashing, too. And while holding those buttons down and watching the numbers flash by until it's back at the right place again is a tedious chore that I never look forward to, I knew I would have to do it to every clock in the house. Afterall, what good is a flashing clock?
Lying in bed thinking of resetting the clocks got me to pondering on the word "reset" and wondering what else in my life needed to be reset. My priorities? Bad habits? My schedule? My career path? My friendships? Relationships? How I spend my spare time? My attitude towards certain things or certain someones? I was quite startled to realize how long the list became - and how quickly and easily it came. I realized that there are several things in my life which are about as useless as my flashing clocks and need to be reset.
Oftentimes we go through life in a rut and don't even realize it. We get into our comfort zones and become complacent without even knowing it. We wear the same clothes, drive the same routes, eat at the same restaurants. We attend the same functions and go to the same meetings, often without even enjoying them anymore...just because it's what we've always done. We stick with the same schedule. The same habits. The same ol' same ol' everything. Just because its easy.
And then once in a while someone or something comes along and pulls the plug. Shuts off the power and leaves us flashing. Unexpected and inconvenient as it may be, sometimes we have no choice but to take the time to reset. I don't know about you but I don't like to be taken by surprise. I like to have at least some say over situations and that's precisely what makes me think maybe I should resest myself before a power outage comes along and does it for me. Now obviously that wouldn't have worked with my alarm clock this morning. No matter how many times I had reset it, the power outage still would have left it flashing. And life may do the same thing to me. And to you. No matter how many times we reset ourselevs, life may still come along and have its turn at us, too. But if there's at least one area in our lives today that could use some resetting...refocusing...rescheduling...rearranging...I urge us to take the time to give that chore - as tedious as it may be - the attention it deserves. And maybe, just maybe, we'll find ourselves back at the right place.
Wednesday, April 2, 2014
Tuesday, April 1, 2014
Don't Be Fooled
Today is April 1. April Fool's Day. And so I couldn't help but stop and think about the things in my life by which I've been fooled...
Maya Angelou was once quoted as having said, "When people show you who they are, believe them the first time." In other words, take them at face value. Don't let your hopes and dreams of who you want them to be and wish they could be fool you into thinking that they will one day magically turn into that person. See the truth in them for what it is - truth. Accept them for who they are, no matter how pleasant or unpleasant that may be, and then decide whether or not there is a place for them in your life.
I've had jobs which I thought were going to be my dream job. I've had friends that I thought would never let me down and would be my BFF for life. I've acquired possessions that I thought would be the answer to all my problems. Fooled. Fooled. Fooled. And the list could go on and on.
Now they say that wisdom comes with age, and although I've never been quite sure who "they" are, I have to admit that this is one time that I think "they" got it right. As I approach yet another birthday, I am happy to realize that my older self is not as easily fooled as I once was. I'm not as easily swayed, not as gullible as I used to be. Life has taught me lessons and I believe I've been a good student.
Maya Angelou was once quoted as having said, "When people show you who they are, believe them the first time." In other words, take them at face value. Don't let your hopes and dreams of who you want them to be and wish they could be fool you into thinking that they will one day magically turn into that person. See the truth in them for what it is - truth. Accept them for who they are, no matter how pleasant or unpleasant that may be, and then decide whether or not there is a place for them in your life.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not talking about being disappointed. I'm talking about being fooled. There is a huge difference. God is the only one who will never disappoint us. We are all human and because of the sinful nature that we all possess, we will all disappoint and hurt one another at times. However there's a fine line between disappointing someone and fooling them. To be fooled means to be tricked and deceived. It is an intentional act with selfish motives that leaves only destruction in its wake. And when we allow someone to bring that type of negativity and harmfulness into our lives, too often we are left cleaning up the mess and picking up the pieces long after they are gone.
Realize the difference today. Know who you can trust and depend on in your life and know who is trying to fool you. Believe them when they show you who they are. Look for the truth in the people that make up your close circle. Who is authentic? Who is real? Who isn't? Delve deep into your relationships and find the answers for yourself. Then believe them. The first time. And as hard as it may be, cast out the fools. Remember, they come with selfish motives and intentions of bringing nothing but chaos. Weed them out today before the mess they leave becomes so big that you're left cleaning it up for years to come.
Do It Afraid
What are you afraid of? What really strikes a chord of fear within you? Recently I was visiting with my friend Tamiko as she was caring for another friend's child . Being a typical 2 1/2 year old boy, all he wanted to talk about that afternoon was bugs and spiders and snakes. She smiled and went along with his choice of conversation topic, agreeing with him and even sharing some spider facts with him. Then he had the great idea for her to draw pictures for him. He was so excited, and so Tamiko got to work drawing spiders. But then he kept insisting that she draw snakes, too. She tried her best to talk him out of it. She really did. She kept drawing his attention back to the spiders, showing him how she had even drawn them with 8 legs. But he wasn't swayed. He was persistent. He wanted a snake.
What the poor little fellow didn't know was that Tamiko is scared of snakes. Terrified. Even ones drawn on paper. But when she realized that her attempts to talk him out of drawing snakes were falling on deaf ears, she eventually gave in and quickly sketched one out on the paper for him. Now you may be thinking, "How silly for a grown woman to be afraid of a drawing of a snake." But I would suggest that you not be so quick to judge. Fear is fear. It is very real and very different for each of us. What scares me and stops me in my tracks may not even cause you to blink. And your biggest fear may seem silly to someone else. But don't underestimate that, while different, they are very real indeed for each of us.
They can be overwhelming at times - even to the point of becoming a debilitating and destructive force in our lives. You may not have a fear of snakes and may not think twice about drawing one on paper, but for Tamiko, that fear is very real. But this is the greatest part about Tamiko - she knows what her fear is. She sees it. She recognizes it. She has claimed it. And she makes a point to stay away from it as much as possible (until a cherub faced 2 year old wants her to draw pictures).
All of my fears aren't as obvious to me as Tamiko and her snakes. Some I didn't even realize I had. As I was thinking about and writing out my personal fears recently, I was surprised to see how long my list grew - and how quickly. Heights...Tight Spaces...Large crowds...Public speaking...Making the wrong decision...Not living up to my potential... One seemed to bleed over into another and before I knew it, I seemed to be afraid of more things than I wasn't. My list was as long as my arm.
Oftentimes we go through life not knowing what scares us. We may find ourselves in the same situations over and over again simply because we're scared to try anything different. Or we may find ourselves trying something new every other day because we're scared of becoming stagnant. Our level of comfort doesn't want to be stretched, and so we stay. Or the comfortable rut scares us, and so we leave. Once we realize fear is the driving force and the reason for keeping us reliving the same repetitive scenarios, we can then work to overcome our fears and see drastic changes in our lives.
Overcoming our fears - whether it be snakes or heights or success or change - can take exhaustive effort on our part. People spend hundreds, perhaps even thousands, of dollars on therapists, hypnotists, physicians and pharmacists all in attempts to seek help in dealing with and overcoming their fears. The largest step in the process of course is naming it and claiming it. Once you know what you're afraid of, then you can set out working to overcome it and get on to living a more abundant life.
No matter what you're afraid of, I encourage you today to stop and study that fear. If its something that is causing you to take a back seat to your life or is holding you back from doing what you want and need to be doing, take a hard look at what it would take for you to overcome it. Lay it down. Walk away from it. And get on with the business of living your life without it.
"For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind."
~ 2 Timothy 1:7
What the poor little fellow didn't know was that Tamiko is scared of snakes. Terrified. Even ones drawn on paper. But when she realized that her attempts to talk him out of drawing snakes were falling on deaf ears, she eventually gave in and quickly sketched one out on the paper for him. Now you may be thinking, "How silly for a grown woman to be afraid of a drawing of a snake." But I would suggest that you not be so quick to judge. Fear is fear. It is very real and very different for each of us. What scares me and stops me in my tracks may not even cause you to blink. And your biggest fear may seem silly to someone else. But don't underestimate that, while different, they are very real indeed for each of us.
They can be overwhelming at times - even to the point of becoming a debilitating and destructive force in our lives. You may not have a fear of snakes and may not think twice about drawing one on paper, but for Tamiko, that fear is very real. But this is the greatest part about Tamiko - she knows what her fear is. She sees it. She recognizes it. She has claimed it. And she makes a point to stay away from it as much as possible (until a cherub faced 2 year old wants her to draw pictures).
All of my fears aren't as obvious to me as Tamiko and her snakes. Some I didn't even realize I had. As I was thinking about and writing out my personal fears recently, I was surprised to see how long my list grew - and how quickly. Heights...Tight Spaces...Large crowds...Public speaking...Making the wrong decision...Not living up to my potential... One seemed to bleed over into another and before I knew it, I seemed to be afraid of more things than I wasn't. My list was as long as my arm.
Oftentimes we go through life not knowing what scares us. We may find ourselves in the same situations over and over again simply because we're scared to try anything different. Or we may find ourselves trying something new every other day because we're scared of becoming stagnant. Our level of comfort doesn't want to be stretched, and so we stay. Or the comfortable rut scares us, and so we leave. Once we realize fear is the driving force and the reason for keeping us reliving the same repetitive scenarios, we can then work to overcome our fears and see drastic changes in our lives.
Overcoming our fears - whether it be snakes or heights or success or change - can take exhaustive effort on our part. People spend hundreds, perhaps even thousands, of dollars on therapists, hypnotists, physicians and pharmacists all in attempts to seek help in dealing with and overcoming their fears. The largest step in the process of course is naming it and claiming it. Once you know what you're afraid of, then you can set out working to overcome it and get on to living a more abundant life.
No matter what you're afraid of, I encourage you today to stop and study that fear. If its something that is causing you to take a back seat to your life or is holding you back from doing what you want and need to be doing, take a hard look at what it would take for you to overcome it. Lay it down. Walk away from it. And get on with the business of living your life without it.
"For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind."
~ 2 Timothy 1:7
Wednesday, March 26, 2014
When Words Won't Come
What do you say to someone when you don't know what to say? How do you find the words to relay your feelings when there just don't seem to be any? We've all been in such situations before. A co-worker has lost her spouse unexpectedly. A fatal accident has claimed the life of a teenager. A child has lost his battle with cancer. His wife left him with little more than a note on the kitchen counter. What do you say? What can you say?
Lyricist Roan Keating penned the song, "You Say It Best When You Say Nothing At All." And while the meaning behind the words is aimed towards lovers who knew each other so well that nothing needed to be spoken between them - just a look or a touch said it all - the title line can also be used to describe how we should respond in difficult situations.
When I was in junior high, one of my best friend's dad lost his battle to cancer. My mother drove me over to her house that night to visit her and her mom and sister. And although we were the typical teenage girls who would normally talk hours and hours about everything and nothing, I don't think we spoke more than a few sentences that night. I remember trying to think of something to say and not being able to come up with a single word. Our normal chattiness had been silenced by my friend's pain. I knew there was nothing I could say to make my her feel better, so eventually I quit trying. I just sat with her in the quietness of her bedroom.
And sometimes that's all you need to do. Just be there. Just show up. Is there someone you need to show up for? Grief may have stolen their joy. Loss may have come calling. Death may have taken their loved one. Or perhaps they are just going through a rough spot or you know things have been tough for them lately. You know you should visit but you just don't know what to say. I encourage you to go anyway. Just show up. Even if the right words never come, your presence alone can speak volumes.
Lyricist Roan Keating penned the song, "You Say It Best When You Say Nothing At All." And while the meaning behind the words is aimed towards lovers who knew each other so well that nothing needed to be spoken between them - just a look or a touch said it all - the title line can also be used to describe how we should respond in difficult situations.
When I was in junior high, one of my best friend's dad lost his battle to cancer. My mother drove me over to her house that night to visit her and her mom and sister. And although we were the typical teenage girls who would normally talk hours and hours about everything and nothing, I don't think we spoke more than a few sentences that night. I remember trying to think of something to say and not being able to come up with a single word. Our normal chattiness had been silenced by my friend's pain. I knew there was nothing I could say to make my her feel better, so eventually I quit trying. I just sat with her in the quietness of her bedroom.
And sometimes that's all you need to do. Just be there. Just show up. Is there someone you need to show up for? Grief may have stolen their joy. Loss may have come calling. Death may have taken their loved one. Or perhaps they are just going through a rough spot or you know things have been tough for them lately. You know you should visit but you just don't know what to say. I encourage you to go anyway. Just show up. Even if the right words never come, your presence alone can speak volumes.
Tuesday, March 25, 2014
Where Does The Time Go?
As I sit here this morning and look over my blog, it's hard to believe that it's been over a year and a half since I last posted. It's even harder to believe that it has been 4 years today since my grandmother went to be with the Lord. Indeed, time flies. And as cliche as that phrase sounds and is, it also holds an immense amount of truth.
Time does indeed fly. Hours turn into days, days into weeks and months and before we know it a year and a half have passed. 4 years are gone. Where did they go? And even more so, how did we spend them? As I sit and look back this morning and think about the passing of time, I'm brought to mind the well known passage from Ecclesiastes. Made popular by writer Pete Seeger, The Birds performance of the song became one of their greatest hits. Ever wonder why it resonated so deeply with so many? Let's take a look at the original lyrics from the original writer - King Solomon.
"There is a time for everything, and everything on earth has its special season.
There is a time to be born and a time to die.
There is a time to plant and a time to pull up plants.
There is a time to kill and a time to heal.
There is a time to destroy and a time to build.
There is a time to cry and a time to laugh.
There is a time to be sad and a time to dance.
There is a time to throw away stones and a time to gather them.
There is a time to hug and a time not to hug.
There is a time to look for something and a time to stop looking for it.
There is a time to keep things and a time to throw things away.
There is a time to tear apart and a time to sew together.
There is a time to be silent and a time to speak.
There is a time to love and a time to hate.
There is a time for war and a time for peace."
~ Ecclesiastes 3:1-15 (New Century Version)
Heres' my thought - the song entitled, "Turn, Turn, Turn" became so wildly popular because it was so relatable. One thing that we all have in common, regardless of our social status, skin color, or nationality, is that we all experience the passing of time and the turn, turn, turning of life that it brings. The thing that separates us and sets us apart is how we spend it. What do we do with our time? And how does its passing affect us?
I have a birthday coming up in a couple of months. Another year older. Another year of my life has passed. 365 days that I can't recover. No matter how hard I work, how much I pray, how much money I earn, how much good I do, one thing I can never accomplish is the recovery of yesterday. Or last week or last year or 1989, or any other year. Once the calendar page has been turned, there's no going back. And oh how quickly those pages turn.
So as I think back to the past year and a half of being absent from this blog, and as the death of my grandmother 4 years ago today weighs heavily on my heart this morning, I've decided that because time flies and because there's no going back, I won't let another day go by wasted. Every day is a precious and priceless gift that can't be bought or earned. Every day is a challenge. A promise. An opportunity.
There is indeed a time for everything. Whatever time it is for you today, I hope that you seize it and cherish it for the treasure that it is. Don't waste it for you can never get it back. Remember the only thing that separates your time from the person's next door is how you spend it. Spend it wisely...tomorrow is coming fast!
Time does indeed fly. Hours turn into days, days into weeks and months and before we know it a year and a half have passed. 4 years are gone. Where did they go? And even more so, how did we spend them? As I sit and look back this morning and think about the passing of time, I'm brought to mind the well known passage from Ecclesiastes. Made popular by writer Pete Seeger, The Birds performance of the song became one of their greatest hits. Ever wonder why it resonated so deeply with so many? Let's take a look at the original lyrics from the original writer - King Solomon.
"There is a time for everything, and everything on earth has its special season.
There is a time to be born and a time to die.
There is a time to plant and a time to pull up plants.
There is a time to kill and a time to heal.
There is a time to destroy and a time to build.
There is a time to cry and a time to laugh.
There is a time to be sad and a time to dance.
There is a time to throw away stones and a time to gather them.
There is a time to hug and a time not to hug.
There is a time to look for something and a time to stop looking for it.
There is a time to keep things and a time to throw things away.
There is a time to tear apart and a time to sew together.
There is a time to be silent and a time to speak.
There is a time to love and a time to hate.
There is a time for war and a time for peace."
~ Ecclesiastes 3:1-15 (New Century Version)
Heres' my thought - the song entitled, "Turn, Turn, Turn" became so wildly popular because it was so relatable. One thing that we all have in common, regardless of our social status, skin color, or nationality, is that we all experience the passing of time and the turn, turn, turning of life that it brings. The thing that separates us and sets us apart is how we spend it. What do we do with our time? And how does its passing affect us?
I have a birthday coming up in a couple of months. Another year older. Another year of my life has passed. 365 days that I can't recover. No matter how hard I work, how much I pray, how much money I earn, how much good I do, one thing I can never accomplish is the recovery of yesterday. Or last week or last year or 1989, or any other year. Once the calendar page has been turned, there's no going back. And oh how quickly those pages turn.
So as I think back to the past year and a half of being absent from this blog, and as the death of my grandmother 4 years ago today weighs heavily on my heart this morning, I've decided that because time flies and because there's no going back, I won't let another day go by wasted. Every day is a precious and priceless gift that can't be bought or earned. Every day is a challenge. A promise. An opportunity.
There is indeed a time for everything. Whatever time it is for you today, I hope that you seize it and cherish it for the treasure that it is. Don't waste it for you can never get it back. Remember the only thing that separates your time from the person's next door is how you spend it. Spend it wisely...tomorrow is coming fast!
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